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So far Newbury Park Christian Counseling has created 29 blog entries.

Nurturing Healthy Self-regard: Social Media and Body Image

By |2024-04-26T12:58:47+00:00April 24th, 2024|Christian Counseling For Teens, Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

There’s a verse in the book of Proverbs that says, “Keep your heart with all vigilance, for from it flow the springs of life.” (Proverbs 4:23, ESV) This verse points out the truth that the thoughts, feelings, ideas, and attitudes we allow into our lives and thoughts influence us in profound ways. The things that preoccupy your mental and emotional landscape shape the person you are and become, including body image. This is why you ought to be cautious about what you allow to enter your mind and heart. In our culture, we are hyper-conscious about what we put into our bodies, but we don’t often show the same kind of vigilance when it comes to the influences we allow into our lives. Social media, like any other tool, can work for our good, but it can also harm us. It requires wisdom to discern when it is not working for you and undermining your well-being. Developing a healthy body image Your body image is an amalgam of the attitudes, thoughts, and feelings you have toward your own body. A positive body image is when you appreciate what your body looks like, what it can do, and what it feels like to inhabit it. Additionally, a positive body image applies to the whole as well as the parts. You appreciate your body as a whole, but you also like parts of yourself. Positive body image doesn’t mean you don’t have things about yourself you may not like or would like to change. It simply means that your predominant attitude toward yourself and your body is one of positive self-regard. On the flip side, a negative body image is when your predominant attitude and feelings toward yourself are negative; you don’t feel comfortable in your body, you wish to change [...]

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Communication Styles in the Workplace: Understanding the Analytical Communication Style

By |2024-07-10T09:35:51+00:00March 15th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

Just like our personalities, we each have our way of communicating, especially in the workplace where we must collaborate with so many people. Understanding our communication style and that of our colleagues and clients can be a great help as it enables us to boost productivity, have better working relationships, and reduce work-related stress. This article is about one style - namely, an analytical communication style. In trying to help understand the different communication dynamics in the workplace, Mark Murphy, who is a leading leadership coach and author came up with the following four types of communication. These are namely: Analytical Intuitive Functional Personal His work further stresses that no communication style is better than the other. Though all of them have different characteristics in how people employ them, they are all equally important to have in an organization. Teams can look at projects and situations from diverse perspectives if everyone is allowed to communicate in the way that suits them best. For this article, we will focus on the analytical communication style. We will describe their main characteristics, strengths, and weaknesses and how to properly work with an analytical communicator if you are not one. Main characteristics of an analytical communication style Judging from the name, we can already see that this is someone whose communication style is geared toward analysis. Below are some key characteristics: Data-driven When they have a point to communicate or a stance to advocate for, they rely strictly on empirical, undisputed data. This means their presentations will include statistics and research-based information. They do not entertain hypotheticals; for them, numbers and proven patterns don’t lie. Logical Analytical communicators work best with information that is logical and factual. They will not rely on feelings, personal opinions, intuition, or optimistic thinking when presenting ideas. This [...]

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Never Alone: Navigating the Fear of Being Alone

By |2024-07-10T09:34:44+00:00February 29th, 2024|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Being made a new creature in Christ regenerates our human spirit. Part of our soul’s healing and deliverance emerges from surrendering parts of our past that threaten our present state (2 Corinthians 5:17). Despite the internal wrestling match, the Lord proves what He has placed in us. Amid complexity, we grow into spiritual maturity as our relationship with Christ blossoms from one life season to the next, despite the fear of being alone. While we treasure countless promises in Scripture, one enduring truth is that Jesus will be with us (Deuteronomy 31:8; Hebrews 13:5). Our Savior will never leave, abandon, or forsake. Sometimes, this can be challenging to process, especially if we struggle with the fear of being alone or by ourselves with no one else around. Fear of being alone differs from loneliness, which is experiencing sadness due to isolation and disconnection. It is more closely linked to anxiety and stress due to being by oneself. The origins of the fear are often traced back to childhood experiences of assault, neglect, or other traumatic incidents, even if no harm was intended. This may include parental divorce, an emergency that compromises personal safety, or the death of a beloved person. These marked experiences from childhood may imprint as abandonment, helplessness, or vulnerability. For a lifetime, a person can feel anxious or vulnerable that the same feelings of loneliness may occur again in a new or similar circumstance. It may help us to allow the Holy Spirit to reveal where this fear has deepened its root in our lives. Often, we try to populate the places where we fear being alone. We may attempt to quell the anxiety, by forming codependent relationships with others whose presence may be damaging. Instead, we need to explore the origin of this fear, or [...]

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Understanding Your Teen’s Manic Behavior

By |2023-12-08T18:21:33+00:00December 8th, 2023|Bipolar Disorder, Christian Counseling For Teens, Family Counseling, Featured, Individual Counseling|

Mania is a condition that displays a high level of energy. It is noticed in the change in moods and behaviors that are not typical for the person. This is a condition in which the changes are extreme, and people will notice. While it has been known to be diagnosed in children manic behavior is more commonly found in teens. Most of the time manic behavior is a sign of bipolar disorder but it can be a mental health issue on its own. It is important to be able to recognize and understand the symptoms to help your teen manage them. It is sometimes difficult to recognize because it looks more like irritability. When you understand what manic behavior is, you can learn to identify the onset of a manic episode. Symptoms of manic behavior in teens Other than bipolar disorder, manic behavior can also be associated with brain injuries or medication side effects. This is why it is important to be able to recognize the symptoms in your teen. Here are the top symptoms to look for. A sizable change in mood. A random spurt of energy. Decrease in sleep. Impulsive behavior. Desires to make changes. A sizable change in normal behavior. Substantial energy increase. Appetite changes. Turbulent relationships. If you notice a combination of these symptoms it is important to make sure that you reach out to get help for your teen. Manic episodes can be dangerous. This is because the episode is typically more likely to be an aggressive outburst rather than one of euphoria. It is imperative to be able to recognize the degree of change in your teen’s moods and behaviors. Triggers of manic behavior Knowing the triggers can help you when your teen is experiencing a manic episode. Most of the time manic [...]

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Helping Your Body Flush the Chemicals of Stress

By |2024-03-28T12:31:54+00:00November 16th, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development|

Stress is not simply difficult on your emotions; it is hard on your physical self as well. Whether stress is low-grade and ongoing, or spikes from an intense or critical situation, your body mounts a response. In stressful moments, the brain floods the body with hormones such as adrenaline and cortisol. In a truly dire situation, these hormones keep you alive! They trigger your flight-or-fight response, enabling you to do things you could not manage under normal situations. However, once the situation has passed or settled, it is not beneficial to keep these hormones circulating. Extended periods of exposure can cause an elevated heart rate and blood pressure. Concerns of Post Traumatic Stress Disorder (PTSD) or Generalized Anxiety Disorder (GAD) could arise. If you have been through a stressful situation there are a few activities that you can do to flush the stress chemicals out of your body and bring “happy” hormones back. Also consider reaching out to a counselor if you feel exceptionally overwhelmed or anxious feelings persist. 4 Strategies for Overcoming Stress Combating stress chemicals with water. Drinking a lot of water is a terrific way to clear the body of stress hormones. Water will most quickly flush the stress hormones out of your body. Likewise, you should minimize caffeine and alcohol intake so as not to thwart efforts. Caffeine is a stimulant. If you have been through a stressful situation, your body is already flooded with stimulant. Alcohol, though not a stimulant, is falsely soothing and addictive. In the long term, if overused, it can actually raise cortisol levels. While taking a bath or shower may not rid your body of stress chemicals, it can have a calming effect. Hot water and Epsom salts can relax muscle tension brought on by stressful situations. Using exercise to [...]

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Natural Remedies for Anxiety to Try at Home

By |2024-07-10T09:36:44+00:00October 23rd, 2023|Anxiety, Featured, Individual Counseling|

We all experience a bit of anxiety. Living busy lives can be stressful, and anxiety often flows from that. It shouldn’t be surprising, then, that anxiety is among the most common mental health issues, and that in the United States, around 1 in 5 adults are affected by anxiety disorders yearly, making remedies for anxiety all the more important. Grappling with anxiety Anxiety doesn’t feel the same for everyone, nor is it triggered by the same things. Anxiety can present itself in different ways, with one person experiencing butterflies in their stomach, while another might have shallow breathing, panic attacks, nightmares, or trembling. It’s important for you to understand what anxiety looks like for you and how it feels so that you can address it if necessary. Anxiety is how your body naturally responds to stress. This has its positive and negative aspects. For instance, anxiety is good because it makes you alert to danger around you, like when a car runs a red light, and you react instinctively. If you have a huge deadline, anxiety can motivate you to stay organized and push you to prepare well. If you’re uncertain about an upcoming decision, anxiety helps you calculate your risks. Anxiety can be unhelpful, however, when it lingers and becomes persistent. If it begins to affect how you live your daily life, you should address it before it gets out of control. Unchecked anxiety can have a huge negative impact on your quality of life, so you should use every tool at your disposal to counteract it. Natural remedies for anxiety There are many ways to deal with anxiety. Below are some natural remedies you can try out. Quit smoking It may function as a quick fix for anxiety, but smoking affects your overall health and may worsen your [...]

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The Pursuit of a Life Well Lived: Bible Verses About Life

By |2023-10-26T12:56:42+00:00August 3rd, 2023|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Spiritual Development|

What is life all about, and what makes for a life well-lived? We all pursue the good life or versions of what we think approximate the good life. A part of what it means to be American is the pursuit of happiness. The problem is that what we think life is all about, and what we think will make us happy, is often a cul-de-sac that doesn’t take us where we want to go. There are many Bible verses about life that can help. Bible verses about life One way of looking at the entire storyline of the Bible is to see it as the contest between life and death. God is the source of life, of all that is good, right, pure, noble, lovely, and beautiful (Philippians 4: 8-9; James 1:17; John 1:4). Turning away from God and choosing our own path is choosing death because life – true, deep, rich, and abundant life – cannot be found anywhere else. Throughout the Bible, God is calling people to return to Him, to find life, and we resist God’s invitation to pursue our own path, to our peril. Some Bible verses about life are below: Then he said to them, “Watch out! Be on your guard against all kinds of greed; life does not consist in an abundance of possessions.” – Luke 12:15, NIV If we’re honest with ourselves, our lives are often structured around the acquisition of things. Our energies are poured into tasks to be able to acquire more. That’s not to say every waking moment is spent trying to accumulate more possessions, but it’s to say that things capture our imagination and seem to function as a measure of success and a meaningful life. We desire great cars, vacations, the latest tech, trendy clothes, and designer [...]

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Depression or Anger? Signs of Depression in Men

By |2023-10-26T12:57:59+00:00July 8th, 2023|Depression, Featured, Individual Counseling, Men’s Issues|

Depression symptoms are often expressed differently in men than in women. If you are a woman, you may have noticed your husband or son withdrawing from you and becoming increasingly angry. If you are a man, do you feel “off and on edge” most of the time? Are you overwhelmed at work? Are you worried about finances and making mortgage and car payments? Is your family having personal crises like illness, drug abuse, unexpected pregnancy, layoff, or marital strife? These are legitimate concerns. Often, our stressors are compounded, and that combination can send us on a downward spiral toward depression. But the signs can be confusing. Is your husband depressed or just angry? Does he need therapy for depression or anger management classes? Stress presents itself in various ways, and two men may not have the same symptoms. Learn the signs of depression in men to get the help you need. Signs of depression in men Learning the sign of depression in men can help you identify when your loved one is having a challenging time. Some men withdraw from their families and engage in risky behaviors like extramarital affairs while stressed and depressed. Others drink too much alcohol and become angry and violent. Still, other men may turn to suicidal thoughts. Every man is different in how he handles stress, his past experiences, and his current situation. The following is a list of the most common signs of depression in men. Loss of interest in pleasurable activities. A common sign of depression is a loss of interest in hobbies and activities once enjoyed. Does your husband love to play golf on the weekends? Does he typically unwind after a long day playing computer or video games? When was the last time he participated in any of his favorite [...]

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How to Manage ADHD in Adults

By |2023-10-26T12:58:59+00:00June 16th, 2023|ADHD/ADD, Featured, Individual Counseling|

ADHD (Attention Deficit Hyperactivity Disorder) is most notably known as a condition that develops in some children under twelve. However, parents and teachers may not recognize the symptoms or choose to chalk up impulsive behaviors and short attention spans as “children being children.” About half of these children will outgrow the symptoms, but the remaining may continue with the behaviors. Thus, ADHD in adults often finds its roots in childhood. ADHD in adults can lead to stress at home and work. In addition, the symptoms may interfere with your daily living and cause tension in relationships. However, there are ways you can learn to manage your ADHD. Symptoms of ADHD in adults The symptoms of ADHD in adults are similar to those in children. However, the stakes are higher when they interfere with your life. Hyperactivity and fidgeting. Moving and speaking quickly. Interrupting others. Little patience. Mood swings and irritability. Unable to focus and concentrate for long periods. Distracted easily. Forgetting important things or losing items. Impulsive behaviors. Risky behaviors with no thought of the consequences. Anxiety and depression. Unable to fall asleep quickly or stay asleep. Starting projects but not finishing them. Moving from task to task and leaving things undone. ADHD in adults can lead to conflict with spouses and coworkers. You may want to consider consulting with a therapist about how to manage your symptoms using psychotherapy methods like talk therapy or Cognitive Behavioral Therapy (CBT). Ways to manage your ADHD You can help ease some of the symptoms of ADHD by adopting new habits. Unfortunately, our lifestyle choices can worsen ADHD in adults. For example, if you consume alcohol or abuse drugs, you may notice a significant increase in anxiety and depression, sleep problems, agitation and mood swings, and restlessness. Consult a therapist if you [...]

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Seeking Renewal: Bible Verses about New Beginnings

By |2024-07-10T09:37:35+00:00April 28th, 2023|Featured, Individual Counseling, Spiritual Development|

Our ability to forget in favor of new beginnings just might be one of the greatest blessings we’ve been given. Sometimes the past is a network of scars, and no rose-tinted glasses can stir up longing for days gone by. People carry many scars with them, whether literal or figurative. Having those experiences ever before them is an added weight to their everyday struggles. Forgetting can help us cope with our past that’s wounded us. However, one remarkable thing about God is how our mourning and pain can, in His delicate hands, be transformed into wells of strength and hard-won wisdom. What was meant for evil and destruction, God can overturn and use for good and to accomplish His purposes. Joseph said this to his brothers after they had sold him into slavery and God used Joseph to save many (Genesis 50:20). God can provide us with new beginnings even when things seem to be at an end and there’s no hope. Why we need new beginnings Everyone has a past. That past is often filled with pain and regret. Some has been inflicted upon us by other people, or we have inflicted pain upon others. Sometimes it is through our own decisions that we bring pain upon ourselves. Pain and regret can leave you feeling stuck. Whether you feel unable to have a romantic relationship because of what a former partner did to you, or whether you are roiling in resentment toward a person who’s in your life right now, the result is the same. Being stuck like this can make you unproductive, and it takes away from your flourishing as a person. We need new beginnings because we are broken people living in a broken world. Other people’s brokenness gets inflicted upon us. This could be from [...]

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