Relationship Issues

Communication Styles in the Workplace: Understanding the Analytical Communication Style

By |2024-07-10T09:35:51+00:00March 15th, 2024|Coaching, Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

Just like our personalities, we each have our way of communicating, especially in the workplace where we must collaborate with so many people. Understanding our communication style and that of our colleagues and clients can be a great help as it enables us to boost productivity, have better working relationships, and reduce work-related stress. This article is about one style - namely, an analytical communication style. In trying to help understand the different communication dynamics in the workplace, Mark Murphy, who is a leading leadership coach and author came up with the following four types of communication. These are namely: Analytical Intuitive Functional Personal His work further stresses that no communication style is better than the other. Though all of them have different characteristics in how people employ them, they are all equally important to have in an organization. Teams can look at projects and situations from diverse perspectives if everyone is allowed to communicate in the way that suits them best. For this article, we will focus on the analytical communication style. We will describe their main characteristics, strengths, and weaknesses and how to properly work with an analytical communicator if you are not one. Main characteristics of an analytical communication style Judging from the name, we can already see that this is someone whose communication style is geared toward analysis. Below are some key characteristics: Data-driven When they have a point to communicate or a stance to advocate for, they rely strictly on empirical, undisputed data. This means their presentations will include statistics and research-based information. They do not entertain hypotheticals; for them, numbers and proven patterns don’t lie. Logical Analytical communicators work best with information that is logical and factual. They will not rely on feelings, personal opinions, intuition, or optimistic thinking when presenting ideas. This [...]

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Surviving Infidelity: What to Do After an Affair

By |2024-07-10T09:38:20+00:00March 21st, 2023|Couples Counseling, Infidelity and Affairs, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

A committed, intimate relationship with another person can be a little like an ocean, with depths and shallows, calm and turbulent stretches, and an endless horizon that can seem at once an invitation to adventure and a daunting prospect. Within a marriage or other committed romantic relationship, the people commit to stick by each other and be faithful to one another. They form a union that sets them apart for each other, but that union can encounter a serious squall in the form of infidelity. Infidelity is a reality that has plagued relationships likely for as long as there have been relationships. Websites, magazines, movies, songs, social media, and more are constantly abuzz with infidelity and engage it from one angle or another. It functions as a plot point in films, or as fodder for salacious gossip about a celebrity or politician. These different spaces sometimes suggest ways to cheat without getting caught, give ideas for surviving infidelity, and even promote different types of infidelity. Amid all this, it’s helpful to get a clear-eyed perspective that draws on Biblical wisdom to understand not only why infidelity happens, but its human cost and ways to repair the damage it causes. What is infidelity? The word infidelity doesn’t mean the same thing to everyone. For some people, infidelity is about having sex with a person other than the one you’re in a committed relationship with. This would include situations as diverse as a one-night stand with a stranger or colleague, soliciting prostitution or making use of an escort service, or a long-term affair. Some consider kissing infidelity, while others only consider sex to be infidelity. For other people, infidelity includes having a deep emotional entanglement with someone other than your spouse, whether or not it includes sexual intercourse. And others consider [...]

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Asking for Forgiveness: When, Why, and How

By |2024-03-28T12:38:13+00:00September 21st, 2021|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Spiritual Development|

In every relationship, be it at work or in your personal life, there comes a time when things go wrong. Promises are made and they aren’t kept, thoughtless actions happen, or words are spoken that should not have been. When that happens, we have several options. We can choose to double down and defend ourselves for what we said, did, or didn’t say or do. Some people will go as far as gaslighting others, telling them that they never said or did what they are being accused of. Or we can choose to apologize, recognizing openly that we did the wrong thing, and address the pain we’ve caused. In some ways apologizing is simple, but have you ever had someone apologize to you and you just couldn’t accept it because it felt forced, trite, and insincere? Or have you ever apologized to someone, but you knew that you were simply going through the motions of something you’re supposed to do? A sincere and heartfelt apology will go a long way and knowing what a meaningful apology looks like will go a long way in helping you in your relationships when you need to apologize. Why ask for forgiveness? Is it important to apologize and ask for forgiveness? Some people do not want to apologize for anything because doing so would lead them to relinquish their anger, emotional distance, and irritability, which they are more comfortable with than vulnerability. Other people struggle with asking for forgiveness because apologizing opens the door to shame, making them feel bad about themselves as people because of what they’ve done. Apologies are threatening to their basic sense of self-esteem and identity, and they would rather not apologize than open themselves up to facing their fears. Apologizing, however, is not traumatic or damaging to either [...]

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On Married Life: Biblical Marriage Advice from a Christian Counselor

By |2021-07-02T19:55:53+00:00June 15th, 2021|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Married life, like most things in life, has its difficulties. Every marriage goes through seasons of sunny, clear skies, but there are also times when dark clouds cover the horizon, sometimes for years. Relationships are complex things, and marriage is one of the more complicated ones, and that’s because it’s one of the closest human relationships we can have. You’re spending your life with someone, sharing everything that you have and are with them – the good, the bad, and the ugly. It takes commitment, wisdom, and grace to navigate the many pitfalls that can beset a marriage. Thankfully, we aren’t left to our own devices because the Bible gives us direct advice about how to conduct our relationships in ways that produce meaningful, long-lasting connections with other people. Biblical Advice about Married Life Because marriage was God’s idea, it makes sense to look to what he says about it so that we can do what works for the sake of our marriages. This article will look at what the Bible says about marriage and married life (and relationships in general) so that we can glean wisdom for our lives. Love, honor, and respect. One of the key building blocks of a happy married life is that the two people in the marriage love, honor, and respect one another. In fact, without these three, it’s hard going for any marriage. In several places in the Bible, husbands and wives are reminded to love and respect one another. It’s no mistake that many wedding vows use those very words. When you live with someone for a long time, you get to see them when they are at their best, and when they’re at their worst. The sense of mystery about them can fade, and it’s easy to lose respect for them [...]

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My Boyfriend Has Anger Issues. What Do I Do?

By |2021-03-31T19:02:53+00:00March 29th, 2021|Anger Issues, Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues|

When you love someone, whatever affects and hurts them has a significant impact on you and your life. In a romantic relationship such as between a boyfriend and girlfriend, issues take on an added layer of complexity, because the question of your future together also comes into consideration. When your partner has anger issues, it can deeply affect your relationship, and it raises the question of what you can do about it. Firstly, it’s important to understand what are and aren’t anger issues, and to understand the options available to you at that point. What are Anger Issues? Most people get angry at one point or another in their lives. What causes us to get angry can depend on a variety of things, including whether we are feeling stressed, haven’t slept, or eaten well, and the issue over which our ire is stirred.   Anger is one of the emotions given to us by God; experiencing it and expressing it in healthy ways can move us toward meaningful action to remedy whatever may not be right in our orbit. Expressed well, anger can communicate the deep wells of our being and let other people know what we care about and why. Anger issues, on the other hand, signal something more troubling that should be a concern. When someone has anger issues, what that generally means is that they either get angry easily and are therefore angry most of the time, or the way they express their anger is inappropriate in one way or another. Some signs of anger issues in a person’s life include: Frequent anger Uncontrolled anger. They don’t rule their anger; their anger rules them. Physical or verbal abuse. Sometimes they may even damage property when they are angry. They may shout, curse, throw or break things to [...]

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How to Work through Relationship Issues

By |2024-03-28T12:40:13+00:00February 12th, 2021|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

Can you relate to these relationship issues? Megan is driving home from work tired from a long day. She pulls into the driveway and walks through the door. Her husband Jason is sitting on the couch watching TV. There’s no dinner in the kitchen. “What’s the plan for dinner?” she asks, putting her purse on the entry table. “I don’t know. What were you thinking?” he answers, without looking over. “I thought we agreed you’d take care of dinner since you are working from home.” “I know, but you are so much better at cooking. I figured I’d wait and let you take care of it.” “You always make me take care of stuff like this, even though you have the extra time to do it since you are working from home. We already talked about this.” “Look it’s not that big of a deal, I’ll just order something in.” “I thought we agreed we were going to cook at home to save money. That’s why we decided you should take care of dinner while I finish work,” Megan snapped. “Well, it’s too late now,” he retorted. They ate take out Chinese food in silence that night. Working through Relationship Issues Any meaningful relationship is going to have issues. Many of you may relate to the tension in Megan and Jason’s story. That’s because theirs isn’t all that uncommon. In this brief anecdote alone, there are some serious points of conflict, including finances, communication, work-life balance, and even gender roles. A silent dinner over takeout Chinese is not the desired end of this relational encounter. Unfortunately, many people find themselves in situations just like this. They are unhappy but don’t know what has gone wrong. This is true for Christians as well. Even though they want to love their [...]

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Opportunity or Oppression? Finances in Marriage

By |2021-05-13T14:17:53+00:00January 22nd, 2021|Couples Counseling, Featured, Marriage Counseling, Relationship Issues|

It is no surprise that finances in marriage are one of the most, if not the most fought about issue in marriage. Finances can be stressful, overwhelming, frustrating, and sometimes halt growth within your marriage. As such, it is important to take time to prioritize your financial discussions rather than avoid them. “Money is either the best or the worst area of communication in our marriages.” – Larry Burkett Consider these scenarios regarding finances in marriage: Nina and Tom have been married for one year. They came into their marriage head-over-heels in love but had not taken the time to sit down and make a budget and plan financially. This has since driven a wedge between them and halted their communication because they both came into their marriage with debt and different opinions of financial priorities. Susan and Tim have been married for five years and usually live paycheck to paycheck. They are thankful that their bills are always paid, even if their bank account is drained before the next payday. Susan and Tim recently found out that they are expecting, and Susan wants to be a stay-at-home mom, but she is not sure how they are going to compensate for losing her paycheck. This has since driven a wedge between them as they are unsure of how to proceed and move forward in the decision-making process. Betty and Caleb have been married for three years and are going through an exceedingly difficult time in their marriage because they have still not merged their bank accounts. They have split the bills between the two of them and feel that they are both very personal people and do not want to share their banking information with the other person. This often causes tension when there is a discussion about new bills [...]

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Women’s Issues: When Your Friend Circle Feels Nonexistent

By |2021-01-25T16:09:14+00:00January 13th, 2021|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Women’s Issues|

When it comes to women's issues, some women are blessed with a circle of friends that share an unbreakable bond. Some women feel like they can bare their souls to a group of friends while others are hesitant and feel they have to walk on eggshells because of past hurts and insecurities. One of the biggest misconceptions we face today is thinking we need to have it all together before establishing healthy relationships. We often “mask up” when it comes to relationships – we put on the façade that we are doing great, even when our world is in shambles or when our heart is broken into a million pieces. Consider the women in these scenarios: Julie has been a loner for most of her life because her family was always moving. Due to the constant moving, she never felt it was worth it to invest in relationships because she feared being too attached before moving again. This lifestyle attributed greatly to Julie’s lack of friends because she never put herself out there and this transitioned to adulthood. She fears the rejection that might come with making new friends. Betty overheard her best friend of fifteen years talking negatively about her and making fun of her insecurities and lifestyle. Her so-called best friend was airing her dirty laundry to a group of her friends and Betty broke when the person she trusted most made light of her life and her dreams. Betty now believes that she cannot trust anyone and never wants to feel that rejection again. Sally was abused by her parents throughout her childhood, which led to abandonment issues, insecurities, and being closed off to the people around her. Sally is embarrassed about her upbringing because she feels like everyone around her is so close to their parents [...]

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How to Build Self-Esteem After Divorce

By |2020-12-15T21:47:43+00:00December 15th, 2020|Featured, Individual Counseling, Personal Development, Relationship Issues|

Whether you were married for four months or forty years, the pain from a divorce can be devastating. Not only can divorce affect your family and finances, but it can also impact your physical, emotional, and spiritual wellbeing. Your self-esteem and confidence can take a brutal hit as you try to make sense of this new normal. If you're wondering how to build self-esteem after a divorce, this article is for you. Four Steps for How to Build Self-Esteem How do you regain the confidence and faith required to fulfill your purpose when you feel like you have already failed? There are four steps you can take to relight the fire of your faith while shining a beam on your self-worth. The First Step: Forgiveness The first step in learning how to build self-esteem after a divorce is becoming aware of any unforgiveness you are harboring. This unforgiveness may be towards your spouse, yourself, or a third party. Perhaps all three. However, learning to forgive sets you free from the bondage of being unequally yoked. It is the initial step that is required so that you will feel lighter and bolder. Once forgiveness is applied, your emotional foundation will begin to feel healthy again. Forgiveness is not automatic for most people, which is why the Lord commanded us to forgive one another. You do not have to walk back into the environment of a toxic relationship to forgive. Only God can heal a broken heart and help a person give another one the freedom of forgiveness. This does not excuse another’s actions or the consequences of their behavior – it just sets you free from the pain so you can begin to heal. Blaming the other person (even if they are at fault) will only serve to keep you prisoner [...]

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