Women’s Issues Archives | Newbury Park Christian Counseling

Women’s Issues: When Your Friend Circle Feels Nonexistent

Kate Motaung2024-11-07T06:47:49+00:00January 13th, 2021|Featured, Individual Counseling, Relationship Issues, Women’s Issues|

When it comes to women's issues, some women are blessed with a circle of friends that share an unbreakable bond. Some women feel like they can bare their souls to a group of friends while others are hesitant and feel they have to walk on eggshells because of past hurts and insecurities. One of the biggest misconceptions we face today is thinking we need to have it all together before establishing healthy relationships. We often “mask up” when it comes to relationships – we put on the façade that we are doing great, even when our world is in shambles or when our heart is broken into a million pieces. Consider the women in these scenarios: Julie has been a loner for most of her life because her family was always moving. Due to the constant moving, she never felt it was worth it to invest in relationships because she feared being too attached before moving again. This lifestyle attributed greatly to Julie’s lack of friends because she never put herself out there and this transitioned to adulthood. She fears the rejection that might come with making new friends. Betty overheard her best friend of fifteen years talking negatively about her and making fun of her insecurities and lifestyle. Her so-called best friend was airing her dirty laundry to a group of her friends and Betty broke when the person she trusted most made light of her life and her dreams. Betty now believes that she cannot trust anyone and never wants to feel that rejection again. Sally was abused by her parents throughout her childhood, which led to abandonment issues, insecurities, and being closed off to the people around her. Sally is embarrassed about her upbringing because she feels like everyone around her is so close to their [...]

Will I Ever Get Married?

Most of us have at one point or another wanted to know what the future would hold for us. A big exam, a job interview, a long-anticipated date, those three dots indicating that someone is typing a text message, or some other major life event may have us scrambling for signs and portents of what is to come. The future is like a darkened mirror in which we see shadows and dim reflections of our hopes and fears. Often, when events eventually unfold, the reality bears no resemblance to what we thought it would be, but our expectations of the future can have a massive impact on the here and now. It’s a good thing to want to get married. After all, Proverbs 18:22 says pithily, “He who finds a wife finds what is good and receives favor from the Lord.” Presumably, the same goes for her who finds a husband. As creatures that reflect God’s capacity for relationship, we desire connection with others and thrive when in meaningful relationships. As we are hardwired for relationships, marriage is an arena where we can be physically and emotionally intimate with another person within a lifelong commitment. That being said, our culture does have a paradoxical tendency to treat marriage either as the pinnacle of adulting and something we all need to have to be fulfilled human beings or as a pointless archaic institution. On the one hand, more and more people are choosing to simply cohabit or eschew marriage altogether for a variety of reasons. For them, the desire to be married seems misplaced. On the other hand, others place excessive value on being married and think that it is for everyone. The questions “Are you married?” or “When are you getting married?” from family, friends, or church members [...]

Women’s Issues

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